The Motherhood

Mothering The Shit Out Of Life

Towards the end of last year I got pretty bogged down with all the things I had to do, the things I did do and things that were never going to get done. My mind became increasingly cluttered and stressed and over burdened by the demands of work, housework, my son, my husband and everything else that goes with it. There was always hoovering to do, always emails to respond to, always a dinner to cook. I was becoming increasingly frustrated with myself and my inability to get everything done. Everyone elses houses are always tidy, why was ours never ever tidy? We’re never even here for fucks sake. At one point I was actually getting up in the middle of the night to hang up washing so it would dry in time. I would voluntarily opt out on reading my son a bedtime story, so that I could get dinner started so we wouldn’t be eating at 9 o’clock again. I was giving a little of myself to everything, meaning nothing got my full attention, nothing truly ever got done or finished and well, I was fucking failing at everything.


However since the Christmas break I’ve changed my outlook a bit, I think it was having time, being off schedule, stepping back and thinking about what is important. What of all these tasks, chores and demands are actually life and death and what ones am I just getting hysterical about? Well most of them, as it turns out. All that really matters are the basics, that we get up, get dressed, get the kiddo to where he needs to be, go to work, function, eat, sleep, repeat. It doesn’t matter if we eat dinner at 10pm, at least we are eating. It doesn’t matter if we haven’t hoovered for a week, no-ones going to die from a bit of carpet fuzz. It doesn’t matter if I didn’t change the fucking air-wick filter or bleach the kitchen sink. It doesn’t fucking matter.
And then I started thinking about all the things I am doing, all the things I manage to fit into each tiny little day. How from the moment I get up at 6.30am every morning, I’m on it. There’s no down time, no rest. I’m going from here to there, to work, to the supermarket and back again. Even when I do take a lunch break its to run errands like buy nappies or post letters or fill up with petrol so I don’t have to do it at the end of the day, so I can get home sooner. I plan ahead, I multitask, I make shit happen. I do the online food shop in bed before I go to sleep. I drive kiddo to where he needs to be, I dance in my seat all the way there because he requests it and because it makes him laugh. Its 7.30am and its raining and its dark and I’m jigging about like a twat to Little Mix and he’s peeing his pants at how ridiculous I am. I make lunches whilst making dinner, whilst hanging up washing, whilst tripping over three cats who are constantly at my feet. I clean the sink while he has his bath. I answer the never ending  “why? why? why’s?”.  I am an all singing, all dancing fucking bionic woman. I am awesome, I am woman, hear me fucking roar.

Obviously I don’t do all this alone, I have a brilliant husband who is doing his bit in the background of this self-involved article. Assembling train tracks, building towers, washing up, mopping up snot, picking up and dropping off, all alongside his own full time job. I don’t do it all, I do half of it all or at least I try to. But for this moment, I just want to remind myself that I’m actually doing a really good job. I am keeping it all together, even though sometimes it doesn’t feel like it. I am productive, I am capable, I am not failing, I am successful.
I am mothering the shit out of life.

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83 Comments

  1. I wish I could get to that point. I’m not even a ‘working’ mother although I do impose office hours on myself for my blog and yet I”m constantly overwhelmed with everything that needs doing. Poor time management however doesn’t help. I’m most definitely not mothering the shit out of life. Good to read your blog again. I first came across it eons ago and haven’t been over in ages. Sorry I’m so late to the party with my comment. #StayClassy

  2. Petite Pudding (@petite_pudding) says:

    Hear Hear – we all need to cut ourselves a break and realise that we are doing a great job, being a mum, wife, worker is never easy. And you know what so long as you don’t bleach the cat and feed the sink its all good. Carpet fluff? Meh it can def go another week! #stayclassy

  3. Aaah, really well said!!!!!! I was nodding all the way through-I identify with lots of what you’re saying! I don’t work, so I don’t have that extra stress to consider, but my children are sooooo demanding, that I can’t get any cleaning or chores done during waking hours, the screaming for my attention is too much, and too stressful!! I really know what you mean about your head being too crammed full of stuff-I feel like this every day, and the list of stuff I need to do is endless… I’m trying to relax about it too, but it’s bloody hard! Keep dancing to little mix and making your son belly laugh-that just sounds the best thing ever!!
    #stayclassy

  4. Great honest post! Thank you! A day in the life of a mom ! #stayclassy

  5. fairyqueen says:

    I loved reading your post, just like i love reading if other peoples kids arn’t perfectly behaved all the time. Because life is bloomin hard and sometimes its so hard that it all comes pouring out. Thats when I normally have an attack of the guilts and say its all ok and that i’m lucky blah blah blah and then make a big lasagne that i don’t really know how to cook and certainly don’t have the time to do …who does!! All because I dared to moan…to myself! You’ve shouted it and I’m applauding you. Well done!:) x

    mainy – myrealfairy

    #stayclassy

  6. I think we all have moments of overwhelming unaccomplishment. I think as moms we put so much pressure on ourself to be perfect we forget we already are!#stayclassy

  7. Oh you have gone and empowered the shit out of being a mum! I was reading the first half really feeling it – I’ve had one of those weeks – hubby has been away in the states and I’ve been looking after 4 kids all week on my own and the boiler has broken so it is bloody freezing and all i’ve wanted to do is moan (actually not wanted to – I have!) But we put too much pressure on ourselves – I so need to chill out right now and reading your post has so helped me with that so thank you! #stayclassy

  8. I make shit happen.I love that little sentence. I have been feeling rather torn and tired lately, in the similar way to you describe giving a bit of myself to everything and I didn’t realise but keeping none for me..work..kids..trying to be a vaguely ok partner..pretending to be sociable. So yesterday I went for a bath after my LO was asleep, ignored the dishes and the laundry and just sat in there with a glass of wine and tweeted.. how to win at life!x

  9. A very uplifting post, just what I needed to read today after a tough mummy day! I may not be perfect but I did my best. Absolotely agree that no one ever died from carpet fuzz! #stayclassy

  10. So true. This is great…so emphatically written! Cheering ourselves on every now and then is so important. And wow you do a huge amount more than I do…although I can claim to some pretty awesome mum dancing for the entertainment of my son! #stayclassy

  11. I LOVE this. I often look at my four children, at my semi-clean and tidy house, and tell myself, WOW you rock!! It’s so important to give ourselves the credit we deserve, we Mums are pretty amazing!!! #stayclassy

  12. Love this post and your positive attitude 🙂 Great post xx #stayclassy

  13. I Love it! #stayclassy

  14. I LOVE the title of this post. I agree that most of us probably don’t give ourselves enough credit for all the things we manage to accomplish throughout the day, even though it never seems like enough. My flat is, and probably always will be, a bit of a disaster. But the baby is dressed, I’m (probably) dressed, we’re all fed, the bills are paid, and we’re making it through somehow. #StayClassy

  15. Great post. You have made me feel all “raaaaah” and yaaaay we can do this, I can do this. I am going to put Beyonce on and dance round my kitchen whilst mothering the shit out of everything #stayclassy

  16. Love this! We are too hard on ourselves sometimes yet we manage to do some pretty amazing stuff. It’s easy to focus on all the things we haven’t got round to, but you hit the nail right on the head – it doesn’t fucking matter! X #stayclassy

  17. Great post…really resonates #stayclassy

  18. Love this! I love the attitude in this post, and the fact you've realised that actually, you are pretty dam amazing!
    Thanks for linking up to #effitfriday
    Debbie

  19. Love this! I love the attitude in this post, and the fact you've realised that actually, you are pretty dam amazing!
    Thanks for linking up to #effitfriday
    Debbie

  20. Thanks Debs really appreciate you featuring it!

  21. Thanks Debs really appreciate you featuring it!

  22. You will never been alone in this – I guarantee you at least one room in our house is a mess at all times!

  23. You will never been alone in this – I guarantee you at least one room in our house is a mess at all times!

  24. Oh yeah we all dance in the car – we get some right funny looks lol

  25. Oh yeah we all dance in the car – we get some right funny looks lol

  26. That's Peggy Bundy (married with children) – not the best mother in the world lol

  27. That's Peggy Bundy (married with children) – not the best mother in the world lol

  28. Wow Sarah I am impressed! You can clearly get shit done too!

  29. Wow Sarah I am impressed! You can clearly get shit done too!

  30. Honestly I think a lot of us put extra unnecessary pressure in ourselves to be perfect. Life isn't perfect, it's messy – go with it!

  31. Honestly I think a lot of us put extra unnecessary pressure in ourselves to be perfect. Life isn't perfect, it's messy – go with it!

  32. I thoroughly enjoyed the high fuck ratio in this post. We are all kind of big deals… thanks for the reminder! #effitfridays
    Tori
    http://www.themamanurse.com

  33. I thoroughly enjoyed the high fuck ratio in this post. We are all kind of big deals… thanks for the reminder! #effitfridays
    Tori
    http://www.themamanurse.com

  34. Hilarious! Love the I am woman hear me fucking roar! I feel that way daily and sometimes feel like screaming it at my kids lol. #effitfridays

  35. Hilarious! Love the I am woman hear me fucking roar! I feel that way daily and sometimes feel like screaming it at my kids lol. #effitfridays

  36. Love this post – at the end of the day you're keeping a little person alive, along with doing half a million other things. Who cares about a bit of dust?? #effitfriday

  37. Love this post – at the end of the day you're keeping a little person alive, along with doing half a million other things. Who cares about a bit of dust?? #effitfriday

  38. Spot on! I can totally relate. I wrote a post a few months ago moaning about my house never being tidy but then acknowledging that actually I'm a mum, so the housework can wait until they're older!!
    #effitfriday

  39. Spot on! I can totally relate. I wrote a post a few months ago moaning about my house never being tidy but then acknowledging that actually I'm a mum, so the housework can wait until they're older!!
    #effitfriday

  40. OMG being a mum is hard! You are right though sometimes you need to take a step off that tread mill and reevaluate what is really important. No one can do everything! Us mums rock!

  41. OMG being a mum is hard! You are right though sometimes you need to take a step off that tread mill and reevaluate what is really important. No one can do everything! Us mums rock!

  42. Yes to all of these – the only thing I haven't done is hang out the washing in the middle of the night! #effitfriday

  43. Yes to all of these – the only thing I haven't done is hang out the washing in the middle of the night! #effitfriday

  44. Love the title! I felt like that all through the month of December because there was just so much to do. Thankfully, I'm over it. LOL! #effitfriday

  45. Love the title! I felt like that all through the month of December because there was just so much to do. Thankfully, I'm over it. LOL! #effitfriday

  46. I am actually tired for you reading this! You really do need to become a multi tasked when you have children, sounds like you've got it down to a fine art 😉
    Thanks for linking up to #Picknmix
    Stevie x

  47. I am actually tired for you reading this! You really do need to become a multi tasked when you have children, sounds like you've got it down to a fine art 😉
    Thanks for linking up to #Picknmix
    Stevie x

  48. Excellent post and as someone else has said already – best title of a post I've seen in AGES! Keep rocking the shit of Motherhood, because you're smashing it! Thanks for linking up to the Mad Mid Week Blog Hop!

  49. Excellent post and as someone else has said already – best title of a post I've seen in AGES! Keep rocking the shit of Motherhood, because you're smashing it! Thanks for linking up to the Mad Mid Week Blog Hop!

  50. This makes me feel so much better about having a messy house right now – at least I know I'm not alone! There just aren't enough hours in the day to get it all done. #FabFridayPost

  51. This makes me feel so much better about having a messy house right now – at least I know I'm not alone! There just aren't enough hours in the day to get it all done. #FabFridayPost

  52. Well Done Mom! I love this post. We are all doing our best and getting as much accomplished as we possibly can and all while keeping our sanity. Keep doing what you're doing. You are awesome!

  53. Well Done Mom! I love this post. We are all doing our best and getting as much accomplished as we possibly can and all while keeping our sanity. Keep doing what you're doing. You are awesome!

  54. I think it is so sweet of you to dance for your little man in the car – we do that too! The next thing you know we are a rocking mother f*er family! haha Honestly – our xmas tree is still in the garden… don't sweat it – you are not alone! You are doing great! It's good to give yourselves a pad on the back from time to time. Thank you for sharing with #FabFridayPost xx

  55. I think it is so sweet of you to dance for your little man in the car – we do that too! The next thing you know we are a rocking mother f*er family! haha Honestly – our xmas tree is still in the garden… don't sweat it – you are not alone! You are doing great! It's good to give yourselves a pad on the back from time to time. Thank you for sharing with #FabFridayPost xx

  56. You are! You go girl. I became a little guilty of envying my more out together friends last year but this year I'm looking or as many ways as possible to cut myself some slack! #FabFridayPost

  57. You are! You go girl. I became a little guilty of envying my more out together friends last year but this year I'm looking or as many ways as possible to cut myself some slack! #FabFridayPost

  58. Amazing post, I love it! I never understand how people with kids have a tidy house, I gave up on trying to keep it tidy. I love this blog post and the title is awesome.xx #picknmix

  59. Amazing post, I love it! I never understand how people with kids have a tidy house, I gave up on trying to keep it tidy. I love this blog post and the title is awesome.xx #picknmix

  60. I like to imagine you doing all this whilst having the hair and outfit of the lady in the photo! Love a bit of 80s big hair. #FabFridayPost

  61. I like to imagine you doing all this whilst having the hair and outfit of the lady in the photo! Love a bit of 80s big hair. #FabFridayPost

  62. What a title! This is a brilliant post! I couldn't help but agree with your intro…but you are doing a great job and who needs a clean house when you have happy children. Keep it up lovely!!! #FabFridayPosts

  63. What a title! This is a brilliant post! I couldn't help but agree with your intro…but you are doing a great job and who needs a clean house when you have happy children. Keep it up lovely!!! #FabFridayPosts

  64. I hear ya! My home is always messy compared to other peoples, but, today I got up dropped five kids at school (not all mine) dropped my boy at pre-school, went food shopping, came home, put the washing away and another load on, painted a wall, made a canvas – all before picking my boy up at lunchtime. I'm now squeezing in a blog post before I walk a mile to pick my girls up. Women rock x #fabfridaypost

  65. I hear ya! My home is always messy compared to other peoples, but, today I got up dropped five kids at school (not all mine) dropped my boy at pre-school, went food shopping, came home, put the washing away and another load on, painted a wall, made a canvas – all before picking my boy up at lunchtime. I'm now squeezing in a blog post before I walk a mile to pick my girls up. Women rock x #fabfridaypost

  66. OMG!! I am hysterical. That's the best post I've read in a while, probably because it's so true for most of us trying to make it through one day with our sanity in tact! I think if we can keep the family fed, happy and alive we're doing ok! Take care, xx #FabFridayPost

  67. OMG!! I am hysterical. That's the best post I've read in a while, probably because it's so true for most of us trying to make it through one day with our sanity in tact! I think if we can keep the family fed, happy and alive we're doing ok! Take care, xx #FabFridayPost

  68. Love this. Go girl! #FabFridayPost

  69. Love this. Go girl! #FabFridayPost

  70. Awesome post! Moms rock this shit!

  71. Awesome post! Moms rock this shit!

  72. this is a brilliant post! You are doing a great job, who needs a tidy house when you have happy children (thats what I tell myself anyway)!

  73. this is a brilliant post! You are doing a great job, who needs a tidy house when you have happy children (thats what I tell myself anyway)!

  74. Title is genius! Keep at it 🙂

  75. Title is genius! Keep at it 🙂

  76. Great post and one of the best titles Ive seen in a long time

  77. Great post and one of the best titles Ive seen in a long time

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