The laziest thing I’ve ever done? Have a C-section!
I’m having an elective C-section next week, it will be my second Cesarean – the first was an emergency. So call me a little over-sensitive (if you fucking dare at 38 weeks pregnant) but when I see flippant comments like this made by women in the public eye, it really does make my blood boil.
I’m sure, it really wasn’t meant with any malice – I mean she’s had one, so she must know for a fact that a C-section and the recovery thereafter is not easy. It’s just something she said to come across as cool and aloof because that is who she is desperate to be seen as. You know easy going, fun loving, lazy as fuck having major abdominal surgeries.
I don’t know her birth story, so perhaps she did in fact opt for a cesarean, free from medical restrictions as a sort of lifestyle choice. Simply because she wanted one (as is her right) in the belief that it was indeed the easier option. Perhaps that is what she meant by this. I really don’t know, because she neglected to explain.
But that doesn’t mean she shouldn’t engage her brain before she opens her mouth. It doesn’t mean she can’t take responsibility for how her words have the potential to affect other women. She is not a novice at being famous, it is not news to her that what she says is heard by millions. It is not news to her that something she says could be misquoted or taken out of context. That it could be misunderstood.
It terms like “easy option” / “lazy choice” / “too posh to push” that cause the damage. It’s these phrases that breed a culture of competition amoungst women over childbirth.
Who tried harder? Who suffered more? Whose the better Mother here?
It’s these comments that instill a feeling of self doubt and insecurity when women go to speak to the Consultants about their birthing options.
Will the Doctor think I’m lazy? Do I even have a choice? Should I not listen to my instincts?
It’s nonsense like this that makes women feel shitty about the birth experience they had, whether they chose it or not.
Did I fail? Was that not a real birth? Do I have to qualify it every time I talk about it?
Did you see that horrific report a week ago about the Chinese lady who threw herself (and her unborn child) off a hospital roof after her family refused consent for a section? It is literally one of the worst things I have ever read about and I still can’t quite shake it. According to reports, the woman was in so much agony and had been told by Doctors that due to the babys size a natural birth was not recommended. However her family refused to give their consent (as required by Chinese law) because of the stigma surrounding the procedure and the appaling state of female rights in their country. So in the end, the woman felt she had no option but to take her life and that of her baby’s.
Was Kate awake in the World for that I wonder? Might she have chosen her words more carefully?